Life has changed. A lot. The moment you went away, it changed. From two cups, only one cup stands. You went away and took my soul with you. And in return, you gave me the memories that are now growing like thorns in my heart.
They hurt. They hurt so terribly much. It hurts when I think about our conversations, the silly ones, the deep ones. How you used to tell me about your past and the awaiting future with an assertive belief that I’m gonna be a part of it. And I used to tell you about my life, how quickly it was changing. How , with an undying interest, you used to listen to all the stories that I’d gathered from books.
I have that book you gave me before the surgery. How perfectly the title fits in my life now like you knew everything. It feels like you. It reminds me of you.
I remember the surging heat in me, how every nerve within me felt awoken when your lips were against mine.
I remember your coruscating eyes with a mixture of melancholy when you threw up blood.
“It’s fine, I’m not dying”, is what you said.
But you lied.
You shut your eyes and for hours I kept waiting, hoping you’ll open them. Hoping you’ll wake up and pull me in your arms like you always did when I was broken. Hoping you’ll wake up and talk about our ‘forever’again.
Only you didn’t.
You went away like a bird from it’s cage. Swift as wind. In the sky, amongst the clouds in the heaven all alone and left me a broken, crumpled soul.
I’ll miss you.
Forever and always.